Everything's Magic
by LoveYouLikeWhoa
Summary: So hear this please, and watch as your heart speeds up endlessly, and look for the stars as the sun goes down, each breath that you take has a thunderous sound, everything, everything’s magic.
1. Chapter 1

**Prologue**

I believe that everyone is born with an innate understanding of the world. When we're little, everything's magic; everything's special. But then, we lose the innocence that lets us see the world in the best way possible.

We grow up and we fight wars. And war… well, war changes everything. It devastates countries and destroys families. Worst of all, it rips children away from their innocence. It takes away the sparkle in everyone's eyes.

But then, sometimes, hopefully, the good side wins. The dead are buried and remembered, as burning tears fill the eyes of everyone they've left behind.

Then, after that moment of sadness and heartache, people begin to wonder about their futures. They start to hope again and with that hope, comes strength. The strength to move on and rebuild. The strength to remember and to know it's okay to cry. Most of all, the strength to know that it's okay to live, even though others can't.

Some people go their whole lives without the kind of strength that war can give a person. Sometimes, I think of how lucky they are. They never had to feel that adrenaline rush that built up, numbing years of pain, before finally draining your body, leaving nothing ibut/i the pain. They never had to feel the tearing at their hearts when it was finally over and they realized that so many people were dead and gone.

Then I realize that people die, no matter what's going on in your life and everyone has pain, no matter what kind. At least I had that strength.

This is a story of life. It's about starting over and gaining that strength after war, no matter how long it takes. It's a story of moving on and knowing that's okay.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter One.**

_I hope that I find you in heaven, 'cause I'm so lost without you down here. You won't be coming back and I didn't get to say good-bye, I really wish I got to say good-bye._

Percy Weasley was not one to let his emotions get the better of him. His own personal motto was that crying is for chumps and only the weak shed tears. However, while he really wasn't the kind of man to break the rules, he knew that those were a few he was going to have to toss right out the window.

He had been thinking a lot in the months that had passed since the war. He had never believed in heaven before; he never really had a need to even think about it. But now, with the passing of Fred, it was all that was on his mind.

Percy had always thought that a successful life was a long life. He had always been so careful, so guarded; he never really knew how to live. Fred had. Sometimes Percy feared that the wrong brother was taken. He would have dreams that instead of crushing Fred, the rubble had landed on him instead. In those dreams, he was almost relieved. Fred was better than him in every way imaginable; every single way that mattered. He laughed better, he hugged better, he loved better. He _lived_ better.

As Percy descended the stairs from his room at the Burrow to the kitchen, his heart stopped. There she was.

For some reason, Hermione Granger reminded him of everything good before the war started. She was the times he spent with his family and his Head Boy badge. She was butter beer and Hogwarts. She was anything that had ever mattered.

It was weird to think of his little brother's girl like that, but she had helped him through so much in the past few months. He couldn't help it; he wouldn't. He was a little ashamed of the way he felt, but he didn't really see Hermione as a potential partner. He just loved her in a way that was uniquely theirs.

She had seen him at his worst. He had yelled and screamed and called her names. She had seen him cry and she had seen him sick on his bathroom floor. She had held him as his dreams turned to nightmares. But she had also seen him at his best. She had made him laugh when he had thought his face would melt from sadness. She had made his heart jump in a way only someone who knew everything about you could. She had told him stories to help him sleep and she had told him about her love for his family, for him and for Ron.

It wasn't difficult for him to keep secrets from anyone, except for her. She had a way of getting him to pour his heart out and he suspected that he had the same power over her. He had told her things about Fred that he would be ashamed to tell anyone else. He had told her of the dreams that he had and of the guilt he felt. At first, he had wanted to tear her heart out. He wanted to be able to see it there, next to his. But as time went on, and she didn't leave him or get tired of him, he wanted to expand it, instead. He wanted to improve her heart and make it work ten times better than it had before.

It was Fred inside of him, he knew it. He could feel Fred guiding his heart, making this connection with Hermione for him. Percy never would have been able to do this on his own. Percy had never known how to talk to people or make them laugh or help their hearts along. He knew that it was Fred working through him and he liked it.

So Percy spent more time with Hermione. He loved her and he knew that she loved him. But that was so small compared to the way that he felt Fred inside of him. That was the real reason. Because the wrong brother was taken, and this was the only way that Percy knew how to make it up to the world.

_The tears come streaming down your face, when you lose something you can't replace, when you love someone but it goes to waste, could it be worse? Lights will guide you home, and ignite your bones, and I will try to fix you._

The nights were the worst for Percy. He forgot everything that he resolved to do during the day, like forget the horrible things he had once said to Fred or try to justify the hurtful way he had left his family. He forgot everything good that Hermione had ever told him and all he could remember were his sins and his mistakes. He tried not to, but sometimes they came at him like a demon in the dark.

He took cold showers and tried not to sleep. Because, although relief came with his dreams of death and Fred, so did guilt, terror and pain. At night, he couldn't feel Fred inside of him the way he did during the day. At night, he was scared and he was alone. At night, the shadows laughed at him and he was weak.

Today, Percy and Hermione had made tea. It helped him to remember the normal things he did, but this seemed contrived and forced. A memory that he had made up. Something that he hadn't really lived through. He remembered discussing what she believed. At the time, she had seemed so confident, so comforting and sympathetic. Now, as he thought about it and replayed the scene, she was mocking him.

This was not the way he imagined living his life. When he had started Hogwarts he had such big dreams. Even at the end of his schooling, he could see what he wanted and how great he would be. He supposed that this was his downfall. He was a betrayer, a liar, a destroyer of families. He wasn't any better than Death Eaters themselves. He had torn his family apart all by himself and everything was his fault.

He knew at these times that he was being irrational and insane and he wanted to change. He wanted to make it through to the sun, to the warmth and comfort of daylight and of Hermione. But at these times, also, he couldn't find where the daylight was supposed to be. It was as if he could see the night, but nothing after it was over, just a gaping hole until the next night began. He could see no comfort.

He began weeping silently. "I hate you, Fred," he whispered into the night air. "I hate you, don't ever come back. I don't want you." It was at these times that he felt the true hollowness of his heart.

And then Hermione entered his bedroom. It was as if her internal clock was tuned exactly to his, as if their insides matched, so she would know exactly when he was hurting and needing her the most.

She had tears drifting down her cheeks. Percy could see them glistening in the moonlight. She came to him by the window and took his hand looking at the stars. It was as if she was looking right into the face of Fred, Percy thought. And in his mind, that made her all the more beautiful.

Percy collapsed into her body. She wasn't quite strong enough to hold his lanky frame and she fell awkwardly against the window sill. But still, he didn't let go. He knew that Fred was inside of her somewhere, just as he had been in him earlier today. He thought that if only he held her close enough, he could squeeze Fred back into his own heart and the hollowness would be gone.

"Baby," Hermione whispered. "Shhh." Percy knew he was selfish. He knew that she was hurting and her heart was breaking and she needed someone just like he needed her. But he couldn't bring himself to ask her or meet her needs. He knew he wasn't strong enough for her.

Percy let go of her a little and led her to the bed. She held his hand as he laid down. She stroked his forehead and he liked the coolness of her hand against his hot skin. She sung him a lullaby, but he couldn't make out the words. He could feel himself drifting into sleep and as he did, he could feel his heart filling again with Fred. "I love you, Hermione," Percy whispered and he finally fell asleep.


End file.
